I like music, long walks on the beach, and poking dead things with a stick.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

 It isn’t old if you’re a tree

Oh hey, look — I’m 40. Weird, it doesn’t feel any different from 39.

In family news, my niece is off the ventilator and out of intensive care. She’s still having problems breathing, but the doctors said that is normal when someone is on the ventilator for a long time. I guess she has to cough up all the crap that built up while she couldn’t cough. They finally got a PICC line in, and that way they don’t have to stick her with so many needles. Things look good, except that she’s been running a fever, and doesn’t have much of an immune system at the moment, so they’re watching that very closely. The only visitors she’s allowed to have are her parents & sisters.

In wedding preparation news, my sewing machine decided to go on the fritz last night when I was halfway done making the first bridesmaid dress. I’ve had the damned thing for TEN YEARS and it’s never given me problems. NEVER. So, of course, this gets blamed on Murphy’s Law. I’m going to fiddle with it a bit more, and if that doesn’t help, it’ll be time to locate a repair shop that won’t charge me more than the blasted machine is worth.

Lyse keeps telling me to relax, that I’m on vacation. I’m not, really. I don’t have to go to work, but it’s not exactly a vacation — or, at the most, it’s a working vacation. I’m not even going to think about all the stuff we have yet to finish for the wedding preparations. Gah.


Monday, June 1, 2009

 Hoping for the best…

Friday night, my sister took her 4-year-old, my niece Katie, to an urgent care clinic because she didn’t think the family doctor’s diagnosis of a respiratory infection a few days earlier was correct. My niece had developed some scary swelling in her face and upper chest, and said she couldn’t breathe if she was laying down, so my sister spent all of Thursday night in a chair with her daughter sitting in her lap so she could sleep.

Katie stopped breathing at the urgent care clinic. Luckily it was directly across the street from an emergency room, and they rushed her over there and got her resuscitated. Then she stopped breathing again. They brought her back again, and life-flighted her to the children’s hospital in Tacoma. By the time they got her there, her breathing was so poor that they decided to intubate her.

But Katie’s a fighter, and she fought so hard that 5 adults couldn’t hold her still enough to be intubated before they finally gave up and sedated her first. They did an MRI and found that she has an enlarged heart, as well as a cancerous mass around her heart, which apparently had been depressing her lungs enough to cause the breathing problems. The doctors told my sister they’d never seen a mass in that location so large in a child that size. Finally, they ran blood tests which returned an initial diagnosis of leukemia, and started her on chemotherapy.

Saturday they did a bone marrow test to further refine the diagnosis, and it confirmed the earlier tests. They decided to keep her sedated, in a medically-induced coma, until she no longer needs to be intubated. They continued the chemo, which started improving her blood counts immediately, but not anywhere near close enough to be hopeful. By Sunday night, the doctors told my sister that Katie had to have radiation or there was little chance she’d survive another day, but that the dosage necessary to improve the situation left Katie at very high risk of future cancer. Of course my sister told them to do whatever was necessary to save her.

She’s still in the coma, still intubated, and there’s a good chance she’ll be in the hospital for a month or so for the initial treatments, with a likelihood that she’ll have to have upwards of 2 years of chemotherapy. They’ll take her off the ventilator (and the sedation) as soon as her blood oxygen improves. At this point, they’re not even 100% certain that she hasn’t suffered some impact from oxygen deprivation on Friday night. The only hopeful sign is that today when they changed the IV lines (and so the sedation was slightly lifted), my sister was talking to her and squeezing Katie’s hand, and Katie squeezed back.

At this point, we just don’t know anything more. Every good sign seems to be countered with a bad sign. I asked if they’d given my sister any long-term prognosis, and they haven’t. My sister and my mom are the kind of people who wouldn’t want to know, anyway, unless they could hear that there’s a 100% chance of everything turning out just fine. And of course there’s not a 100% chance.

My sister has two other daughters, who are 10 and 19. The eldest just got married and is expecting a baby in November. Luckily she’s being a real trouper and taking charge of her 10-year-old sister at home while their mom stays at the hospital with the youngest. Both grandmothers are in the area, helping with meals and laundry and such. There’s really nothing I can do to help, except to pray, which I’m doing.

It will be a very long time before Katie is out of danger. At this point, we don’t even know how certain it is that she’ll reach her fifth birthday, which is in 7 weeks. Hopefully she’s enough of a fighter.


Wednesday, May 20, 2009

 Death by paperwork

Geoffrey found out more today about being in the Navy’s Delayed Entry Program, and we discovered his basic training starts on April 10th (not in June) of next year. Because I’ve been married before, we have to get a certified copy of the divorce decree (first husband) and death certificate (second husband) so the military can have proof that I’m not a bigamist. (They don’t need to know about my other boyfriend. *grin*)

Poor Geoffrey, he’s not even allowed to talk to females during the 8-week boot camp, unless they’re instructors who have spoken to him in the course of training. That will be rough for him, considering that he’s never been all that impressed by the company of his own gender. Between now & then, he’ll be attending weekly training & PT sessions. They already gave him his first official Navy shirt — it says “United States Navy Health Care Team.” Oh crap, we’re both officially in the health care business now. (All we need is to get Lyse a job with the VA Hospital, and we’ll have a trifecta!)

Totally unrelated, I looked my name up on Google (for the first time ever…scary!), and found something I had completely forgotten about from 15 years ago: I got published in the Dear Abby column. I wasn’t asking for advice, mind you, I was giving it. (I’m sure that will shock and amaze those who know me.) If I’d looked a bit harder, I’m sure I could have found the Letters to the Editor that I wrote to various newspapers that also were published in the early 90′s. Not like I was opinionated or anything. *smirk*

I’m continuing to be woefully unprepared for the wedding; reserving the park and making/mailing the invitations are the only things we’ve accomplished thus far. We don’t have a ceremony hammered out. We haven’t ordered the cake, or figured out what other refreshments we’ll have. I don’t even know for certain what I’m wearing yet — or if I’m going to buy it or make it. Good thing I have several days of vacation immediately prior, so I can frantically catch up on everything and turn into a total stress puppy. Hey, I do work well under pressure.

Hell, the only thing keeping me from completely freaking the high holy fuck out is the thought that on June 22nd, I can collapse in whimpers. Also visualizing a certain book cover helps.


Saturday, May 16, 2009

 Anchors aweigh

My beloved Geoffrey has gone and done it but good this time. He’s officially signed up to become a member of the US Navy Reserve. Based on his college transcripts and the fact that his ASVAB score was for the highest score that the recruiter had ever personally seen, he’s going in at the rank of E-3.

He ships out for basic training on June 1, 2010. When he’s done with that, they’ll be sending him to “A” school. When he’s done with that, they’ll be sending him to “C” school. All total, he’ll be in 40 weeks of training (as I understand it, for most of that he’ll be in San Diego). All that training will turn him into a corpsman, which I guess is sort of like a physician’s assistant or uber-EMT (embedded with a Marine platoon, so effectively he’ll be a combat medic).

Looking forward, I can see the advantages — when we need a critter doctored, well, that training should stand him in good stead. *grin*

I was a Navy brat. Now I get to be a Navy wife. At least he gets to keep his long hair until he ships out for basic…and he’s already promised me that I will do the cutting (not something I look forward to, but I’ll be damned if I let some stranger do it, and the hair get tossed into a trashcan!).


Wednesday, May 13, 2009

 Dusting off the keyboard

It’s been a month since I’ve blogged?! Oh crap. Hey, I’ve been busy.

For about 3 months prior to my grandmother’s 80th birthday (the first weekend of May), I’ve been cross-stitching a gift for her. And not cross-stitching from a pattern, mind you, but an original design I put together myself. (NEVER do that! The math alone — and I say this as a person who likes math — was aggravating to the nth degree. Ohmigawd, what a huge pain.) I finished it a whopping 15 hours before the start of her birthday party, only to discover that the frame I’d purchased for it was broken upon removing it from the packaging. Since it was 11-freaking-pm, I had no choice but to dash back to the store as soon as it opened the morning of the party and exchange the frame. Then I remembered why I hadn’t done cross-stitch in years (about 10 years, actually…) — framing that stuff is a stone bitch. (This was, most unfortunately, before I discovered a nifty product called “peel & stick mounting board,” which I will use for my next needlepoint project.)

Anyway, here’s the finished product, which is approximately 11″x13″ (forgive the lousy pic, it was taken in a hurry under less-than-ideal conditions):

All I can say is 18-count Aida fabric can BITE ME. That’s 18 itty-bitty cross-stitches per inch of fabric! Only certifiably crazy people use anything smaller than 14-count. (Thank the gods I didn’t try 22-count. I tremble in fear just thinking about it.)

In other craft-related news, there are 6 (SIX, gah!) projects that I have partly finished, and 2 more in the works that I really need to get started on as soon as possible (which means “after the wedding”). The partly-finished include an afghan for Anxiety, an open-work tunic-style sweater for Angst, a cap-sleeved summer pullover for myself, an artsy wall decoration that I keep forgetting to finish up, and some other stuff I’m keeping under wraps for the time being.

And now for something completely TMI…


Monday, March 23, 2009

 Marriage ≠ monogamy

My mother visited yesterday (it was her birthday), and we talked a bit about my & Geoffrey’s plans to get married. At one point in the conversation, she said, “So this is going to change your ‘other’ relationships?” (She’s known for over a decade that I’m polyamorous.)

I laughed. And explained to her that Geoffrey and I have no intention of ever becoming monogamous. In fact, if we have our way, we’ll eventually be adding to our relationship rather than closing it off! (Ideally we’d like to have Geoffrey’s girlfriend Tam become part of our family and household, should the opportunity arise. We already have firm plans to combine households with Lyse in a few years, and while she’s not romantically involved with either of us, it will still be a lifetime family commitment.)

If I was fertile (which I’m not) and we wanted to have a child (which we don’t), there might be some merit to at least temporary monogamy for Geoffrey and me. But I can’t think of any other reason why it would be beneficial to our relationship to close it off. Sure, we had some serious conflicts involving polyamory during our first few years together, but we got those worked out and our relationship has only become better and stronger for it. The current stability of our relationship has lasted years longer than our prior conflicts and difficulties over ‘other’ relationships — and we both earned our current stability through serious effort, putting our commitment as a top priority, and developing more than a little personal growth.

Most importantly, I have a profoundly deep faith and belief that Geoffrey and I will be together forever, and that nothing (and nobody!) can come between us. So we won’t be including vows of emotional or sexual fidelity in our wedding. “Forsaking all others” does NOT sound like a loving sentiment to us!

Non-monogamy isn’t for everyone, not by far! But monogamy isn’t for everyone, either, and certainly not for us.


Monday, January 12, 2009

 Not-manic Monday

After my weekend — which featured moving a couple of couches for Lyse, doing tons of laundry & dishes, and hellacious migraines that Would. Not. Stop. — I didn’t expect to have a very pleasant Monday.

Surprise, surprise. It was a pleasant Monday, strangely enough. *knock wood*

I have a hovering suspicion that part of the reason why is that I refused to let aggravations get to me. Yesterday I announced to myself that this was going to be a really good week, because: 1) I’m not working up at Exile Island, 2) I have a 3-day weekend at the end of it, 3) I’m going to see my Number One Internet Fanboy on Friday night, come hell or high water, and 4) Battlestar Galactica comes back in only 4 more days! YAY!

So starting off my Monday with the mindset that it’s going to be a good week may have, just possibly, inclined me to ignore that which normally riles my temper up something terrible. Not that I’m going to start a gratitude journal or anything like that. Besides, I’m too busy procrastinating writing my life story for my descendants. (BTW, did you know that you can type an ISBN into most booksellers’ sites search engines, and the book you want will pop right up? Neat, huh?)

Now Lyse is demanding I go spend time with her. But she’s making homemade meatloaf & mac-n-cheese from scratch (I don’t have to cook!!!), so I shall. *grin*


Wednesday, January 7, 2009

 A week already?

So hey, it’s been 2009 for a week already! How the hell did that happen?!

My year has thus far featured migraines, miserable weather, menstruation, and missing 2 days of work (due to migraines, complicated by back-ordered meds at the pharmacy). Not a great start, and I certainly hope it doesn’t set a precedent.

I looked for one of those silly questionnaires to sum up my year in 2008, but found only ones suitable for junior-high ditzes. I suppose I could just copy and paste the text of my 2008 newsletter that we mailed out with our (NRA – *grin*) holiday greeting cards, but I figure the vast majority of people who read this blog already got one mailed to them. (If you didn’t but would like to, email me your snail-mail addy and I’ll cheerfully put you on the holiday card list. Judging by the length of the 2008 newsletter, I may have to send them out every solstice instead of just for Yule.)

And now for something completely TMI…


Thursday, December 25, 2008

 I got coal in my stocking

No, really. Robert & Claire gave me coal for Yule. (I find it amusing that it took until my 40th Xmas for someone to give me coal. Tee hee!)

One of the Xmas cards we got this year (from a relative of Geoffrey’s) included a newsletter that was chock-full of pushy, overweening Christian sentiments. After indulging in a bit of vicious desire to saturate my next year’s Yule cards & newsletters with cheerfully obnoxious Pagan sentiment, I calmed down and reminded myself that I’m better than that. Proselytizing=rude.

As I remarked to Lyse (who got me a silver Claddagh ring! OMG YAY!) last night, one of the reasons I do the responsible thing in any given situation is that I really, really like self-righteousness. It warms the cockles of my heart. (I may be a bitch, but I’m an honest and responsible bitch! *grin*)

Time to go choose a Yule log for the ceremonial burning tonight! Happy Santa Claus Day!


Sunday, December 21, 2008

 Freeeezing

I’m not dreaming of a white Solstice, but that’s what I’m getting. Le sigh. Again, I must reiterate: wind chill = EVIL.

Today’s adventure: drove to Beaverton! In the snow! Without chains or snow tires!

And now for something completely TMI…


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