The calendar says it’s April, but apparently Mother Nature didn’t get the memo, because it’s been cold and obnoxious. I say we change the name of the month to Apruary.

I wanted to blog on the 1st, but I couldn’t think of anything appropriate for the day. I knew nobody would believe that I was entering a convent, pregnant with triplets, taking up body painting at Burning Man, or fucking Matt Damon.

Having 5 cats in the house for the last 10 days has been terribly amusing. It did not surprise me that, after the first couple of days, Zadya stopped hissing & growling at the interlopers (Lyse’s cats — Wolverine and Gizmo…gee, you think she likes movies or something?). Nor did it surprise me that Hasani was apparently too stupid to notice that a couple of new cats were in his house, and continued to be terribly confused every time he spotted one of them. It did, however, surprise me that Michiko still hasn’t stopped being afraid of Lyse’s cats. Maybe it’s because they’re both at least double her weight…or maybe she’s just a weird little kitty. I mean, damn — she eats lettuce! What kind of cat loves lettuce?!

Anxiety made us go to IHOP tonight for dinner, because she wanted Who-Cakes. I hate pancakes, but I discovered that they make pancakes with cornmeal — and they’re scrumptious!!! We all made fun of Lyse because she eats her pancakes from the inside out. Then the Red-Headed Stepchild said that she eats her pancakes clockwise, so we made fun of her too.

My new bed is really damned spiffy. It’s HUGE. I made a joke the other day that it’s called a California king-sized because it’s not politically correct to call it “orgy sized.” Desmond at work nearly choked to death laughing. I just love that boy; he’s utterly adorable…even if he did call me “Kitten” when I arrived for my 4 hours of overtime today. (Don’t get any ideas, people. Only Desmond is allowed to call me that. He won my heart a few weeks ago when he arrived at work coughing & sniffling one day, and I asked him if he was sick. He smiled brightly and answered, “Yeah — you wanna make out?”)

In other work news, I was absolutely stunned when I was elected to become one of the two call center reps who helps represent the rest of the reps at meetings. I had no idea that enough people liked me and thought highly of me to vote for me! (I know I’m good at my job, and I try to be likeable, but it still blew me away. I kinda felt like Sally Fields accepting an Oscar.)

Law Dog is one of my heroes. Read this to find out why.

Now going to try to relax and enjoy the rest of my weekend.